It is never easy to draft the perfect breakup letter. One can never seem to get the right words to convey their emotions, especially when finding the right words means that the experience will be less damaging for the parties involved. It is easier for one to lose track of what they want to say in such situations; therefore, drafting writing a breakup letter is the best idea. Breakup letters give you the time to sit and compose your words carefully and thoughtfully in a way that an emotional conversation might not allow.
If you are not able to draft the right words to break up with someone gently, it is good to look at a great example and use it to help you in drafting the perfect breakup letter. Here are a few samples of different types of breakups you can use.
Most breakups usually happen when people drift apart. Start by admitting how great things were once between the two of you, let them know how you felt at the end. It is key that you clarify to them how things fell apart so that things are clear between you both. Keep in mind that the letter is not meant to blame them but just showing what happened and why you made your decision. Leave your anger out of it.
At one point in my life, I was convinced that we were the same person, and I could not get enough of you. You always challenged me far more than I could give, and I was good for it. I still remember that night we stayed up all night on the beach, and you assured me that I was special to you even though we had just met. I still believe you meant every word of it.
Unfortunately, it is not like that anymore. We don’t feel the same way for each other. We are more of each other after work obligations. A friend that you promised to see but hoped would cancel. I find no joy in it, and it isn’t the kind of relationship I envisioned. I am neither mad nor happy about it. I will always look back on what we had as something beautiful in my heart, but we did not sacrifice to keep it that way. However, I am not blaming you or me. It is what it is, and that’s why it is over.
The Disrespectful Breakup
This type of letter is usually sent for nasty breakups, usually due to lies or cheating. The point of the breakup letter is not to take any unnecessary digs- it is about holding the other party accountable for betraying your trust. Write this letter to yourself without regarding the other party. This letter is to acknowledge that the other party’s actions did hurt you and that you have moved on.
Obviously, you are aware this relationship is over, but that is not the reason I’m writing. I’m writing because there was a lot of yelling during our last meeting, and I didn’t get a chance to speak out mind, or rather I didn’t say it in the way I intended to. I loved you, but you betrayed my trust and really hurt my feelings. Honestly, I feel like I’m going to be messed up forever by this. I think you understand how that feels.
For the sake of our love for each other, you should’ve at least walked out, because then, I could have handled it even though it would’ve sucked. But instead, you chose to lie repeatedly. For how long?
The guy I fell for would have treated me with more decency. Sincerely, I don’t care if you read this, but I hope you do for the sake of whomever you’ll end up with.
The “Follow your Dreams” Breakup
This letter is usually written for situations where either party must move for school or work to follow their passion. At times, other things take precedence over a relationship, even if the relationship is with someone you deeply love. Acknowledge their love in the letter and remind them that it’s not their fault that things must end that way.
I know this sounds cliché, but it is not about you, it is about me. I got my dream job offer, and I must take it. You know I have been working towards this opportunity for the last eight years. You were with me for the better part of it. I would have tagged you along, but it is not your path. You can’t just leave behind everything you have worked for to follow me. It will not be fair to you. Also, I can’t assure you that I will be able to give you everything you need.
Love is all about timing, at least 90% of it, and that feels right for now. I am sorry that this is the way things happened, and I’m not just saying that. I loved you, and you will always do. Please don’t be mad at me.
The One-Sided Breakup
At times you know deep down that a relationship is never going to work out. You gave the relationship a shot, and it’s just not working. When writing this type of breakup letter, it is important that you use a cold tone but not mean. You can’t leave the door open here. The breakup is from you, so you don’t have to give them hopes that they can win you back. Let the other party know how you are feeling and allow them the chance to ask questions after that remind them that it’s over for good.
I don’t know of a better way to say this, but I’m just not feeling what we have anymore. At first, I thought it was what I wanted, but it’s not. You are a good person. You are intelligent, attractive, kind, but the zing, passion, or the spark is just missing.
I know it came as a surprise, and I can’t express how sorry I am. If you look at us on paper, we as a couple makes sense, but we both know that is not how love functions. I can’t do this any longer. We need to follow separate paths and move on. Should you have any questions, please ask right away, but after that, we can’t keep on communicating.
The “Let’s Be Friends” Breakup
This letter is usually written for breakups that were mutual when the passion dies, and you would still like to remain friends with the other party. The biggest obstacle with drafting this type of letter is that one must emphasize that you’re willing to work to be friends. There is no anger here, but remember that it is work, great work, and effort that you must put into making sure that the friendship works. It can get awkward at times, so it is important that you acknowledge that and move on.
I am sure you anticipated this; we talked about it several times. Strange how things work out that way sometimes. I want you to know that I cared for you, but this feels right. I appreciate everything. I really mean it, and I’m excited for what life gives us next.
Before I sign off, I want to say, let’s not make it bizarre. I meant every word when I said I just want us to be friends. I intend to make this work. I know everyone says they will, but eventually, everything feels weird about it and let go. What we share is too good to let that happen. Anyway, chat soon.
Writing a breakup letter to someone can not only help in bringing closure to the situation but can also take the place of a face to face breakup. Breakup letters are also a great way of expressing yourself in situations where you weren’t allowed to. When one is filled with emotions, it is always hard for one to get out what they need to say. Remember that the most important thing when writing the breakup letter is conveying exactly what’s in your heart and letting the other party know how you feel and why you are ending the relationship with them.